It's been a minute since I've written a blog, and I am so glad that I decided to write again. I have so many different thoughts to share, but to be honest I just didn't know where to start. Actually, I want to recant that statement... I didn't want to start! Starting meant that I would have to be accountable to producing content. That means I would have to sit down and make time to write, but I was so distracted with my emotions and that's worst thing to do. Emotions can take you on a roller coaster if you allow them to. Note to self: Don't trust your emotions!
Emotions are real, but if they aren't managed properly they can cause you to become distracted. As I reflect over the last 9 months of my life I can pinpoint several different instances on how I let my emotions distract me. These distractions resulted in me wasting TIME. Time that I can never get back, time that was valuable, energy that could've been used to produce a project or enhance myself in business, etc. I literally can see how I became my own distraction.
I have learned that real healing comes from being honest with yourself. You will never experience real freedom if you aren't honest with yourself and God. Note: Always be honest with yourself. Honesty unlocks the door to your freedom. So here's my truth... I love hard whether platonic or romantic. If I'm on your team then I'm all the way in. Because of this I tend to get disappointed when someone doesn't love the same way as me. Is this fair? At the time I would have said "No, it's not", but what I have come to learn is that you cannot expect anyone to act like you because they aren't you! Note To Self: Don't expect someone else to be you. That's a false expectation.
I became so lost in my experience that I spent days, weeks, and months talking about the same thing. Crying about the same thing, replaying scenarios in my head, and questioning myself about myself. I was literally consumed with the emotions that derived from my experience. Emotions that were valid, but those emotions weren't going to change what happened to me. Those emotions were only keeping me stuck. Yes, my emotions were my distraction. I became stuck. I was stagnant and literally not growing! It was like I was in a trance and meanwhile time was passing me by.
I was still working because I had bills to pay, but I was not maximizing my moment or the opportunities that I was presented with. I was becoming my own distraction. I had to recognize that I was limiting myself. I kept trying to justify what I was feeling by focusing on the cause of my pain, but that wasn't necessary. Looking back, it wasn't important anyway. That wasn't my battle. The real question I should have been asking myself was "What's next? What is the next place?" That's easier said than done...trust me I know. I am not saying become emotionless. I am saying that we must learn to manage our emotions before we self destruct. Note To Self: Manage your emotions, don't let your emotions manage you.
Don't become your own distraction! Understand that God understands and He really does know. Pick yourself up and MOVE FORWARD!
You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.
-Psalm 56:8 NLT